Frame, Confidence, and Having Fun


Ladies, discount help me out here…

Men, prescription have a strong frame and confidence and you’ll create a wonderful dance for the ladies. Even if you only know a couple moves, cheapest execute them well and have fun; the ladies will have fun, too.

A strong frame is developed through confidence and practice. Some characteristics of a strong frame are

  • commitment to your moves and motion
  • no extraneous motion, every movement is filled with purpose
  • width – spread the arms and legs a little wider
  • openness – hands should be a little wider than the elbows which are a little wider than the shoulders, elbows bent at greater than 90 degree angle
  • wholeness – carrying your whole body into the motion, from feet to torso to hands.

The biggest obstacle I’ve encountered that hindered my frame is confidence. If I’m confident, I have good frame; if I’m not confident, I have bad frame. This is an internal state of knowing you are capable and believing women want to dance with you.

Your frame and confidence create an environment for the lady to enter. When she agrees to dance, she agrees to enter the space that you create and to move with you as you move the space. She wants to know where the space is (commitment to move, no extraneous motion), she wants to feel welcomed in the space (width and openness of frame), she wants the space to be fun (you have fun and the space will be fun).

This is what partner dancing is about. It’s not about the number of moves. It’s not about the complexity or coolness of the moves. It’s about creating this space and inviting a partner into it. This creates a connection and an intimate interaction.

Ah… and here’s the meat… when the lady agrees to enter this space you can continue to operate on the same “level” or you can invite more of her into the space. For example, you invite a lady to dance and you start with some basics. Then you lead an outside turn. That invites a little more of her into the space. But what if you lead a subtle left then right shoulder roll… that invites quite a bit more of her into the space. It is a deeper motion and connects with her on a deeper level. This is more intimate… and more fun! Similarly, leading her to swivel her hips is even deeper, more intimate, and more fun!

But careful here… executing a lead that, by rote, generates a certain response in the follow is not creating this space or connection. This is a kin to saying “Hi, how are you?” “I’m fine, thanks.” There’s nothing in this interaction. The lead must be such that the response is contained within the lead. Now this is difficult to communicate in words… But you understand that if a follow knows to turn left every time you wink your left eye and right every time you wink your right eye, there is no response contained within those leads. Instead, at some previous time you agreed or were taught that this is what the follow will do when you wink. If instead, you put your hands on the follows shoulders and turn her, now you have led something.

Men, you are setting the tone and creating the space. You are creating something for the ladies. What is required of you is internal strength projected into your frame and an attitude of fun. The ladies will love it!

2 Responses to “Frame, Confidence, and Having Fun”

  1. Beth says:

    I love this post! Dr. Swing, why aren’t you blogging anymore? After only reading the first couple I want to read them all! Get back out here and get yo groove on :)

  2. Beth says:

    …And I meant to say that this is so true! Fellas, listen to what this says here here and you’re sure to win your lady’s heart and feel great about it.

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